ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Randomize
