So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
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