Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
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