Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
