Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
