Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
