When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
