nut hugger
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize