Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize