everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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