Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
