Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
well most of my day revolves around power hour
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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