The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Your cock deserves a montage
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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