So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
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