I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
