On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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