Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
