Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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