im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Randomize
