Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
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