fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize
