doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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