And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
