I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
