I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
