have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I just want nice things and good sex
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize
