oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
