Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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