i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
