He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize