So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
