you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Randomize
