Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
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