I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
