You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
