That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
