I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
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