I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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