I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
