Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Randomize
