For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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