Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Randomize
