There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
