The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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