Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I just gargled with NyQuil
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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