she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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