Will you blow on my dice?
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
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