Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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