is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
