he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
